HERE ARE SOME STORIES FROM THE NEWSPAPERS
AND THEY ARE TRUE

Where's Barry Scheck When You Need Him?
Malvin Marshall, 27, was finally released from jail in
North Charleston, S.C., on October 29
after being locked up for 6 weeks because a POLICE FIELD TEST
had found that he had heroin in his pocket.
The state lab had finally gotten around to analyzing the substance, which was determined to be VITAMIN PILLS
that had gone through a wash cycle while in his pants pocket.
Said a police lieutenant,
"The field test [is] not foolproof."
.
The New York Daily News reported in November
that 71-year-old twin sisters
Ynette Sapp and Olvette Mahan
had just gotten plastic surgery (mole and wrinkles removed)
on their faces purely so they would continue to look exactly alike. Said the doctor, the situation is not that unusual;
for example, another identical pair was scheduled the next day.
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YOUR FRIEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN AND THE BACK ALLEY GANG