Blogstream   -   Create a Blog!   -   Login Chat   -   Options   -   Clean   -   Flag   -   Family Filter: Off   -   Recent   -   Rndm >>    

 
BIG DEANS FUNNY STUFF FOR YOU!


 GOD'S GIFT TO ADAM
 

BEING THAT TODAY IS THE DAY MOST OF US WILL GO TO CHURCH, I FOUND THIS FOR YOU IT IS GOD TALKING TO
ADAM LET'S LISTEN IN

One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said.
Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first."
Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children."
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate these organs one at a time."

NOW ISN'T THAT THE TRUTH
HAVE A GREAT REST OF THE WEEKEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN
Posted by BIG DEAN at 7:55 AM - 13 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 OLD AGE
 

"Old age is not so good when ya got gals like these

"OLD AGE

Two elderly women were fussing about their husbands over tea one day.

"I do wish my Leroy would stop biting his nails.
That makes me terribly nervous!" the first one said.

"Oh, my Elmer used to do the same thing," the other woman commented.
"But I broke him of that habit real quick."

"What did you do?"

"I hid his teeth!"

Honey have you seen my teeth?

YOUR FRIEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN
Posted by BIG DEAN at 6:44 AM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 THREE INSURANCE SALESMAN............
 

WELL I guess i will leave you with this thought
"Three Insurance Salesman".............

Three Insurance salesmen were having drinks and boasting about each companies' service.

The first one said, "When one of our insured died suddenly on Monday, we got the news that evening and were able to process the claim for the wife and mailed a check on Wednesday evening."

The second one said, "When one of our insured died without warning on Monday, we learned of it in 2 hours and were able to hand-deliver a check the same evening."

The last salesman said, "That's nothing. Our office is on the 20th floor of the Empire State Building. One of our insured who was washing a window on the 85th floor, slipped and fell. We handed him his check as he passed our floor."

Ug! I am glad that last guy's not mine
have a great weekend
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN
Posted by BIG DEAN at 7:46 AM - 7 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 THE JOB HUNTER
 

WITH EVERONE AND EVERTHING LOOKING FOR JOBS
NOWDAYS; I THOUGHT YOU ALL WOULD ENJOY THIS ONE I CALL:

"THE JOB HUNTER"

A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, stating the following: "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer."

A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.

Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he lead him into the office. Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.

The manager said "I can't hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type." The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair.

The manager was stunned, but then told the dog "the sign says you have to be good with a computer." The dog jumped down again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to enter and execute a perfect program, that worked flawlessly the first time.

By this time the manager was totally dumb-founded! He looked at the dog and said "I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I still can't give you the job."

The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his paw on the sentences that told about being an Equal Opportunity Employer. The manager said "yes, but the sign also says that you have to be bilingual."

The dog looked at the manager calmly and said, "Meow!"

HAVE A GREAT DAY

YOUR FRIENDS,
GARFIELD, TOMMY, LULU, MRS KITTY AND THAT ILL OLD
LAFT MISISTER' ME
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN
Posted by BIG DEAN at 7:02 AM - 6 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 THE LOVERS
 



AH TRUE LOVE IS WONDERFUL! AND THESE TWO ARE IN LOVE
your pal
garfield, tommy lulu and friends and the old joke-maker
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN
Posted by BIG DEAN at 7:48 AM - 4 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
Pages:   1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53
   
  About Me
Author: BIG DEAN
From KENTUCKY, USA
Age: 63
 
This blog is about...
HI, I WILL POST FUNNY STUFF THAT I FIND ON THE WEB MY AIM IS TO BRING A SMILE OR TWO TO YOU.... more
 
My: Profile  Gallery  Interests  Bio  Guestbook  100 Things 
 
Bookmark   History

  Blogstream Sponsors
Have you checked out the new Blogstream site,

Question Stream.com?

Many Blogstream members are there already! Quotes from members: "It's like blog lite!" -- "I like the instant gratification!" -- "Stop spectating, get in the game!"

If you have not joined in, you are really missing out!

Send Free
Just Saying Hi
Greeting Cards
at

Greeting Cards.com


Good Morning


  Recent Posts

  Blogs I Like

  Sites I Like

  Archives

3389 Visitors