A BLONDE, A COP, AND "THE MISSING RING"

A cop saw a blonde down on her knees under a streetlight.

"Can I help you?" he asked.

"I dropped my diamond ring and I'm looking for it," replied the blonde.

"Did you drop it right here?" asked the cop.



"No," she responded, "I dropped it about a block away,

but the light's better here."

MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN AND FRIENDS

OK MY FRIENDS HERE WE GO-- A WEDDING-- A LITTLE GIRL AND HER MOMMY
AND A GREAT QUESTION

"THE QUESTION?
A little girl at a wedding asked, "Mommy, why do brides always wear white?"

"Because they're happy," the mom replied.
Halfway through the wedding, the girl whispered,
"Mommy, if brides wear white because they're happy,
then why do grooms wear black?
ANY ANSWERS OUT THERE???
YOUR FRIUEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN AND FRIENDS

Bob and Joe sat next to each other taking a test. When they finished, the teacher called them up to the front of the room and said, "Boys, I will have to give both of you a zero on this test"

"W-why?" they wanted to know, though Joe was shifting uncomfortably.

She said, "Your answers were too nearly alike. One of you cheated and the other one let him do it."

"What makes you think we cheated?" Bob asked. "That could have been a coincidence."

The teacher said, "I might have believed that if it wasn't for the fact that when you came to question #10, Bob wrote in 'I don't know' for the answer, and you, Joe, put 'Me neither'!"

I GUESS THE TEACHER GOT THE GOODS ON BOB AND JOE!
YOUR FRIEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN

A SCOUTMASTER WAS TEACHING HIS BOY SCOUTS about survival
in the Alaskan wilderness.

"What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost alone in the woods?" he asked.

Several hands went up, and many important things were mentioned, such as water, matches, etc.

Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand.

"Yes, Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring?" asked the Scoutmaster.

Timmy replied, "A compass, food, and a deck of cards."

"Why's that, Timmy?" the Scoutmaster inquired.

"The compass is to find the right direction, and the food is to maintain you during the rescue."

"And what about the playing cards, Timmy?" asked the Scoutmaster impatiently.

"Well, sir, as soon as you start playing solitaire, someone always walks up behind you and says, "Put that red nine on top of that black ten!"

Yep! that will happen won't it
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN

WELL, I KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF NEW COUPLES THAT ARE OUT THERE, (some old ones too!) LET'S LOOK AT THIS NEWLY MARRIED COUPLES VISIT TO A MARRIAGE COUNSELORS OFFICE:


At the Counselor's Office

After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant arguments, a young man and his wife decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling.

They had been at each other's throats for some time and felt that this was their last straw.

When they arrived at the counselor's office, the counselor jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion.

"What seems to be the problem?"

The wife began talking 90 miles an hour describing all the wrongs within their marriage.

After 15 minutes of listening to the wife,
the counselor went over to her,
picked her up by her shoulders,
kissed her passionately for several minutes,
and sat her back down. Afterwards, the wife sat there speechless.

He looked over at the husband who was staring in disbelief at what had happened.
The counselor spoke to the husband,
"Your wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!"

The husband scratched his head and replied... "I can have her here on Tuesdays and Thursdays."

YOUR FRIEND,
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN AND FRIENDS