"ATHE PARROT AND THE MAGICIAN"

A magician on a cruise liner had a parrot,
who'd seen all the magician's tricks a jillion times, long ago having figured out how the magician made everything in the act disappear. The parrot got bored, his owner growing stale and not developing any new tricks that the parrot could figure out.

One night in the middle of the magician's performance, the ship hit an iceberg and sank.

Everyone drowned except the magician and the parrot. The magician managed to swim to a piece of wreckage and climb aboard, immediately collapsing from exhaustion.

Soon afterward, the parrot flew to the magician and perched on the edge of the makeshift raft and stared at the magician. And stared. And stared.

For a whole day the magician was unconscious, and all this time the parrot didn't take his eyes off him. Eventually the magician started to stir. Looking up, he saw the parrot, still eyeing him intently, not even blinking.

Another hour goes by, and finally the parrot squawks, "All right, I give up. What did you do with the ship?"


YOUR FRIEND
DEAN

FOR MY YOUNG READERS OR MY YOUNG AT HEART


THE "FBI" CANINE TEST"

A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI. "Well," says the personnel director, "you'll have to meet some strict requirements. First, you must type at least 60 words per minute."

Sitting down at the typewriter, the dog types out 80 words per minute.

"Also," says the director, "you must pass a physical and complete the obstacle course."

This perfect canine specimen finishes the course in record time.

"There's one last requirement,"
the director continues; "you must be bilingual."

With confidence, the dog looks up at him and says, "MEOW!"

Note: You got to admit that's one "COOL CAT"

"EXPENSIVE PARROTS"

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot.

The shop owner points to three identical-looking parrots on a perch and says, "The parrot on the left costs $500."

"Why does the parrot cost so much?"
asks the customer.

The owner says "Well, the parrot knows how to do legal research."

The customer then asks about the next parrot,
to be told that this one costs $1,000 because it
can do everything the other parrot can do
plus it knows how to write a brief that will win
any case.

Naturally, the increasingly startled customer asks about the third parrot,
to be told that it costs $4,000.
Needless to say, this begs the question, "What can it do?"

To which the owner replies,
"To be honest, I've never seen her do a thing, but the other two call her Senior Partner!

"COME IN"

The mail carrier had a registered letter that needed a signature for a party on his route.

Receiving no response to his knock on the front door, he went around to the back door which he found open, except for the screen door. He knocked.

A high pitch voice from inside said, "Come in."

Upon entering the kitchen, he was confronted by the largest German Shepard he had ever seen.

The dog bared his fangs menacingly, forcing the mail man against the wall. "Lady, call off you dog before he eats me alive." The only response he got was that same high pitch voice coming from the next room saying, "Come in."

Pressing his body against the wall, he slowly worked his way to the door way leading to the next room. Looking around, he saw the room was empty, except for a parrot in a cage.

After the threat from the huge dog,

he was becoming quite irate and said
to the parrot.



"Darn you, don't you know any words besides 'Come in?"



Without a moments hesitation the parrot responded, "Sic him!!!"



HAVE A GREAT DAY!
YOUR FRIEND
MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN

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MAN MOUNTAIN DEAN